Tip #50: Learn when to say no.
The why: When you have anxiety, or even if you don’t, learning how to say no to things is an invaluable skill.
The truth is, sometimes your colleagues, your family, your friends, your pets, will ask too much of you.
You have to learn your limits and feel okay with stating them.
“Could you just help me with this report?”
“Could you please teach me this section in the textbook?”
“Could you please come with me to this super huge party where neither of us will know anyone?”
Sometimes, it’s just a bit too much.
Now of course, if you feel well enough and able, you should be the most helpful person in the world to the people you care about.
(And always say yes if your professor, teacher or boss asks something of you)
But, and we’re all guilty of this, even when we’re absolutely swamped and can’t cope with what we’ve currently got on our plates, we still say yes to taking on more.
Our brain creates all these awful scenarios in which we say no and people are angry at us and hold it against us, which forces our mouths to say the word yes before they’ve even finished their sentence.
Now, they very may well do if when they ask you to do something for them and you respond like this:
But there are plenty of ways to say no politely, that will inspire no ill feelings.
Instead, try saying:
“I would love to help you. I’m currently very snowed under myself right now, and may not have time. Can I get back to you later? You may wish to ask someone else just in case I can’t.”
Now, no one will ever criticise you for this response.
You’ve demonstrated your value to them by telling them how you’d love to help.
You’ve demonstrated your relatability by stating you’re snowed under, as everyone has had a time where they’ve been too busy. They have no choice but to understand.
You’ve demonstrated a genuine desire to help if you have time, but have also set them up for you not being able to complete the task.
You’ve been perfectly reasonable. There certainly are many ways to say no without inspiring anger or negativity.
Only you know how much you can take on day by day. Save yourself the extra stress, and learn how to say no.